Preaching To Save My Soul?

Religion is a mask.

Sometimes we wear it in the attempt to cover up the neurosis of our soul and mind. For some, there is no mask, and religion has effectively purged the dark corners of the soul. What you see is what you get. But for others, the more frenzied the religious activity, the greater the cover-up. I have known some in my profession popping anti-depressants, very religiously active, yet so lost. And there are others, who’ve come to terms with the darkness in their souls, stared it down, and lived to talk about it. I think most of us fall somewhere in between those two examples.

Spurgeon once said: “Don’t preach the gospel to save your soul”. As I am wrapped up more and more in perfectionism, anxiety to accomplish something great, self(or other)-imposed ambitions and expectations, I find myself losing my soul at times. Shalom escapes me and the sense of divine peace is replaced with performance-enhancing [binges, all-nighters, frenzy of activity]. I won’t trade my ambition for anything. Better to be ambitious than to be a lazy ass, my father taught me. But too often I find myself 5 steps ahead of the divine, rushing into something that the world is not ready for, the spirit is not ready for, the times are not ready for. Taking steps back to breathe I focus on the words of an old wise man: “On God, my salvation and my glory, rests.“

Here are some statistics of us, the broken shepherds, from a fellow shepherd who has been a mentor, a coach, and an example to me:

• 80% of pastors say they have insufficient time with spouse and that ministry has a negative effect on their family.
• 40% report a serious conflict with a parishioner once a month.
• 33% say that being in ministry is an outright hazard to their family.
• 75% report they’ve had significant stress-related crisis at least once in their ministry.
• 58% of pastors indicate that their spouse needs to work either part time or full time to supplement the family income.
• 56% of pastors’ wives say they have no close friends.
• Pastors who work fewer than 50 hrs/week are 35% more likely to be terminated.
• 40% of pastors considered leaving the pastorate in the past three months.

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Changing gears… Advocating the alien
A friend who has been working long in pastoring international students told me today of a growing awareness of the need to minister to the alien students on our campuses, due to the tragedy at VA Tech and the killer being a “resident alien”. I mean, “duh”. How long has it taken for the rest of us to realize that? Too many of our University ministries have focused on the predominant, majority ethnic and cultural populations. I have not seen many strong, concerted attempts at multi-diversity (ethnically, culturally…). We raise up a homogeneous group of young leaders, we get a homogeneous church in the end. And then we complain we’re not diverse enough. And that’s besides the point. Would a stronger International Ministry at Tech have averted the tragedy? I don’t think so. But did it have to take a tragedy like this for the larger North American religious body on University campuses to wake up to the need to reach out, minister to, advocate the alien???